Pining To Opine

Becoming pregnant means flipping a switch of awareness that you didn't know existed. Before you become pregnant, you know of the existence of carseats and pacifiers, of infant formula and cloth diapers. Maybe you've heard of Tiger Moms or Attachment Parenting because some of your friends have opinions about them. Then you become pregnant and IT IS TIME TO GET SOME OPINIONS, STAT.

Parenting is all about opinions. You thought it was about love and family and pitter-pattering feet but you were dead wrong. It is about defining your identity and defending your intellectual as well as genetic turf and that requires thinking that you think something and being ready at any given moment to "share your opinion." You have the right to an opinion. If you cannot afford an opinion, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the obligations I have just shared with you? With these obligations in mind, do you still wish to have that baby?

(Okay but is it going to be at a hospital or at home, are you going to vaccinate, what brand of carseat are you getting and which model, are you going to circumcise, are you going to breastfeed, are you going back to work, how soon after the birth, are you doing to co-sleep, are you using a crib, are you using a stroller, do you have a breast pump, are you using disposable diapers, do you use bleach, does your baby sleep on its stomach, are you reading to your baby in the womb, do your kids get screen time, are you married to the other parent, did you do IVF?) 

Perhaps the most relevant question I can think of is whether or not it's anyone else's business. Let's think about that a spell.  

Maggie Frank